50 Shades of Grey Bike ...... (Episode V)

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NGneer
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Re: 50 Shades of Grey Bike ...... (Episode IV)

Post by NGneer » Wed Jan 09, 2013 10:15 am

Episode V – The Laird of the Disc

Back in the mists of time the world was a place of chaos and turmoil, with warring factions roaming the lands forever seeking more (horse) power. This was until a wise and noble man named Soichiro Honda brought peace to the world by uniting the various tribes through a common love of his beautiful engines and handling. bighug

To keep the peace and remind the tribes and their descendants of the dark times of the past and what it was that had eventually saved them from that dark path; four brake discs were cast in the fires deep in the heart of the Honda skunk works. One for the world of Honda, One for the Suzuki tribe, one for the Yamaha clan and one for the Kawasaki people who live in the mountains. Image

However, unbeknown to them all a fifth disc of pure evil was also cast with the power to ruin the peace and harmony that Soichiro Honda had given to the world............
Image

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Despite their best efforts Darth bodge had failed to be lured out of his evil Death Shed lair by the collective efforts of the wise and knowledgeable Greydi. Mark Piestalker, the young Greydi warrior who had led the effort, would now have to focus his energies on training his new youngling Padawan so the fight to save Darth Bodge from his continuing decline into the Dark side of the V4 Force was once again passed to the Greydi collective.

Darth Bodge broke cover and reports reached the Greydi that once again poor Nancy was suffering a terrible fate. Having discovered that she had passed the information of her abuse to the bothan spies (see episode IV) he vented his wrath upon her already poor abused frame. :spank:
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The disc was waiting......ever watching..... looking for a weak mind it could manipulate......it wanted to be found......it wanted to ruin the peace and harmony............it wanted to wreak havoc upon the world of Soichiro Honda...........it wanted to be found.... it WANTED to be found....!!
Image

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Darth Bodge reviled that he had found a “disc” on Evil-bay that was a bargain (.... it WANTED to be found....!!) and intended to fit it to Nancy to replace her own worn rear disc. (Many bikes had been designed with a rear disc in the form of those cast many years before as homage and a reminder of the peace that prevailed). The Greydi saw pictures of the “disc” and at once knew its gnarly and scored exterior merely hid a heart of pure evil and malevolence. As one they urged the weak minded Darth Bodge to cast the scaby and evil disc aside and for once treat Nancy to a proper ‘quality’ item and buy a new disc from Obi Wik Oliver. Image

But the power of the disc was strong and the mind of Darth Bodge was weak so he refused the advice from the Greydi and decided to fit his ‘precious’ disc to Nancy. Armed with few tools, no knowledge and even less patience – he set about ripping and tearing at the little that remained previously unmolested, of Nancy’s rear end.
Image
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The disc was evil...........the disc wated to make chaos..............the disc had found an ideal new home.........
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Almost immediately Darth bodge had issues as without the right tools he was trying to find a shortcut way to fit the evil disc without removing Nancy’s hub. He was urged once again by the Greydi to wait and do the job properly........ but the disc was strong and the mind was weak.... and he forged on regardless. Soon, and some might say inevitably, he met the challenge of a stubborn bolt and within minutes the bolt head was mashed and Darth Bodge in a fearsome rage started to talk about reaching for the angle grinder!
Image

With this alarming development, and even more fearfull for poor Nancy’s fate than usual, the Greydi pleaded with Bodge to ‘step away from the power tools’ and managed to convince him there were better ways to tackle the problem. The Greydi also sowed the seed of an idea in Darth Bodges head that, as it was winter and a rear end overhaul is really quite simple, why not take some time and do “a proper job”. Whilst the Greydi’s first concern was for the welfare of poor Nancy they had a second reason for this suggestion. Maybe, just maybe, by taking his time, getting to know Nancy better and being able to appreciate the pleasure that comes from the knowledge of a proper job, done well, Darth Bodge may yet see the light and learn the way of the V4Force. :pray:
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The Disc was angry........The discs plan to ruin one of Soichiro Honda’s creations by angle grinder and fool had been thwarted Image..........the disc wanted revenge.......the disc had a plan......to destroy poor Nancy piece by piece!!
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Over the ensuing weeks Darth bodge was inspired somehow to attack Nancys rear calliper using fire and mole grips, despite the Greydi’s best efforts to stop him. He made attempts to remove the front axle with Nancy still resting on her front wheel and all the time “the disc” fed more ideas for unnecessary invasive procedures into the willing mind of Darth Bodge. Image

What would become of poor Nancy, Would the men who make the inspections ever deem her fit for use again, and would Darth Bodge ever be turned from his Dark and evil ways, back to the way of the truth and the light.

May the V4 Force be with you....

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Re: 50 Shades of Grey Bike ...... (Episode V)

Post by CMSMJ1 » Wed Jan 09, 2013 10:58 am

Ausgezeichnet!
IMPERATOR REX ANGLORUM

The V4 is the law..

NC30 - No9 - my old mate

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Re: 50 Shades of Grey Bike ...... (Episode V)

Post by Marsbar » Wed Jan 09, 2013 12:28 pm

Best threat ever!! :plus: :plus:

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Re: 50 Shades of Grey Bike ...... (Episode V)

Post by vfrman » Wed Jan 09, 2013 12:59 pm

And we haven't even gotten to the rear shock and clocks....

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Re: 50 Shades of Grey Bike ...... (Episode V)

Post by NGneer » Wed Jan 09, 2013 1:15 pm

vfrman wrote:And we haven't even gotten to the rear shock and clocks....
I was getting too much material - so had to do a bit of a catch up chapter as I think the rear shock/clocks could be worthy of a book by itself ;)

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Re: 50 Shades of Grey Bike ...... (Episode V)

Post by Drunkn Munky » Wed Jan 09, 2013 1:19 pm

Its about this was made a sticky and never to be forgotten

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Re: 50 Shades of Grey Bike ...... (Episode V)

Post by Yakama » Wed Jan 09, 2013 1:24 pm

NGneer wrote:
vfrman wrote:And we haven't even gotten to the rear shock and clocks....
I was getting too much material - so had to do a bit of a catch up chapter as I think the rear shock/clocks could be worthy of a book by itself ;)
A clockwork done wrongage

Image

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Re: 50 Shades of Grey Bike ...... (Episode V)

Post by vfrman » Wed Jan 09, 2013 2:04 pm

Stuck!

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Re: 50 Shades of Grey Bike ...... (Episode V)

Post by xivlia » Wed Jan 09, 2013 5:02 pm

so where is the stuff on how i actually managed to get the caliper out. bought new seals, installed new seals, got some red rub grease greased it up? how about the fact that i removed the hub, changed over the disc, its actually a good disc, and is working better than the old rusty OEM one.. re-greased the hub bearings, cleaned the rear sprocket, got the front tyre valve stem changed, got the front tyre changed....huh? where are those?

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Re: 50 Shades of Grey Bike ...... (Episode V)

Post by webby16 » Wed Jan 09, 2013 5:27 pm

brilliant this is so funny and such a good read. 50 shades of greybike such a good parody!!!


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